Change. I could write a whole book on change, but for the purpose of this article, I’m going to keep it brief. Change is something we are always doing, whether we like it or not. Fact. It’s inevitable. For this reason alone, resisting change is futile. Resisting change or the inability to accept and flow with change is the number one cause of suffering or grief and the number one reason people come to see me in the clinic.
Why did you last come in to see me (or another wellness practitioner) in the clinic? Most likely, it was because there was something that you needed help in changing. It may have been the removal of a pain or a symptom, support during a difficult period of life change, or an emotional or mental imbalance. Whatever it was, the fact that either you wanted help in changing something or support so you could accept the changes happening in your life more easily was the likely motivator.
Change is a stress. Now read carefully…. what we commonly call stress is actually distress. Stress is simply the challenges in life that make us get up and do something. For example, feeling hunger is a stress, and it makes us get up and go and find something to eat. If, however, we can’t appropriately respond to the stress, we go into a reaction of distress, in this case, starvation. It’s not the motivator that causes distress i.e., the need to eat doesn’t cause distress, but rather our inability to respond appropriately to the stress. Ok, so it sounds simple, change is inevitable, and it is simply a call to action.
So why do we resist change? And why does our inability to change appropriately cause us so much pain? There’s no one answer here, but fear of the unknown, loss of control, negative past experiences, attachment to the old, and a lack of energy or motivation to change are common culprits.
Based on my experience, I have realized there 3 steps to change. These are:
Simply being aware that something is changing or there is something you would like to change is the first step, and surprisingly, sometimes, this step alone is enough.
You need to accept that there is something changing or something you would like to change. This one seems obvious, but THIS IS A BIGGIE!! I have caught myself MANY times, and I have seen it MANY times. Clients, we resist change. Despite the pain it is causing us, we resist the current situation as it is and the need to change. Until we can first accept where we are at right now and allow ourselves to courageously look into that, it is virtually impossible to let go or to change. (This leads me to another topic of Letting Go, but I will address this next week.)
3. Focus your energy on the new, not on the old… and make a resolve to embrace the change with ease
Get on and do it! And set your intention for how you want to do it, for example, quickly and easily. I am all for using symptoms and situations for lessons and learning; however, sometimes, we keep learning the same things over and over. We have the learnings on repeat because we either lack the awareness, the ability to accept, or the courage to move on. So be aware of what needs to change or what is changing, accept it, and make a resolve to get on with embracing the changes.
Did you enjoy this post? Feel free to share it with a friend and comment below on how being open to and accepting of change is helping you. I always love hearing from you!